American Psycho (2000) – Movie Review

A close personal friend of mine (No, it’s not Tom Skerritt) recently tweeted out that “We will never beat the 80s as a decade. I am convinced of it”. If anything portrayed in “American Psycho” is close to accurate, then I would say that tweet was a gross understatement. I am not a go-go commie-punchingContinue reading “American Psycho (2000) – Movie Review”

Avengers: Endgame (2019) – Movie Review

Ladies, gentlemen, humans, and non-humanoid gelatinous blob beings alike, what just happened? Marvel has spent the last 11 years constructing a complex, interconnected web of stories, and in the process, built an entire universe for us to enjoy. Now, they give us what is essentially their grand finale! 22 individual films have all led upContinue reading “Avengers: Endgame (2019) – Movie Review”

Léon: The Professional (1994) – Movie Review

Apparently, I have been on a Natalie Portman movie binge this past couple of weeks. So, maybe 2 of her films in a row does not exactly make me the Joe DiMaggio of movie reviews, but she is the lead 3 of the last 5, which is certainly not too shabby. I am just aContinue reading “Léon: The Professional (1994) – Movie Review”

Annihilation (2018) – Movie Review

If I could describe “Annihilation” in six words it would be “The most beautiful nightmare ever created”. When I call it a nightmare, I do not refer to it in a negative sense, rather that of a mild psychedelic trance. The omnipresent sensation that something is off and the paranoia that comes with that areContinue reading “Annihilation (2018) – Movie Review”

Hellboy (2019) – Movie Review

“Hellboy”? More like “HellbOy Vey”! *Insert 90s Sit-Com Laugh Track* I should probably end the review right there because nothing I say can top that. Similarly, nothing I saw in the movie could either. I’ll be upfront, this movie is not for the casual movie-goer. Its plot is burgeoning with complex fairytale jargon at everyContinue reading “Hellboy (2019) – Movie Review”

The Ballad of the Fallen Star Wars Fans: Long Day’s Journey into Night

This past year and a half have not been an easy one for Star Wars fans. There is a volatile fault line that exists underneath our familiar bed of overopinionated fanatics. “The Last Jedi” has been so divisive amongst us that we can not even agree to feel excited about the upcoming conclusion to Disney’sContinue reading “The Ballad of the Fallen Star Wars Fans: Long Day’s Journey into Night”

I have had it up to here with Disney and their remakes

Before you mindlessly hand over more of your legal tender to Disney, please do us all a favor and rip it up first. Hell, you can burn it or even make some fine origami. Or better yet, keep the money. But please stop paying for Disney to remake their own movies. Disney is remaking “Dumbo,Continue reading “I have had it up to here with Disney and their remakes”

So, what do we do after ‘Endgame’?

Allow me to transport you to the wondrous time that is last Sunday afternoon. The sun, it was shining. The birds, they were chirping. And as for me, I was just finishing up a bagel and going to see “SHAZAM!” with two of my friends. Our cups overrunneth with the rich bounty of hopeful optimismContinue reading “So, what do we do after ‘Endgame’?”

SHAZAM! (2019) – Movie Review

DC Comics and Warner Bros. at one time sat alone atop the throne of the superhero film genre. But that was many a moon ago. Since Christopher Nolan’s “Dark Knight Trilogy” ended in 2012, DC has had a noticeable lack of direction, especially in comparison to the wallet-consuming unquenchable black hole that is the MarvelContinue reading “SHAZAM! (2019) – Movie Review”

Top 10 Star Wars Films

I have very few marketable skills in this world. My existence is merely justified because of gratuitous sarcasm, and the fact that it isn’t all that cost effective to send me into space to live out my days so as not to disturb the peace of what remains of polite society. And so, while myContinue reading “Top 10 Star Wars Films”